Low notes and High notes

I am going to start this post with a low note and I am going to end on a high one. I am not sure that all of these qualify that much for the humor theme. Please let this one float someplace in the middle. It has some storm and some sun.

It seemed that is was not long before we had to go through another event of losing an infant. It was pretty much the same way it happened before. In those days they did not have the testing that they do now.  Although Deb and I remained optimistic that the pregnancy of our second child had some good signs it was also true that there were some concerns.  This time a little girl was born and we named her Megan Leigh.  A life of about 3 ½ hours was all that we had.   Somehow we were a little more prepared.  We conducted a family service and buried the baby right next to Jason Brandon, our first.  In a way the emotion of the event hit us even harder than the first time.  In addition to the sadness of the loss was the fact that evidence brought forward the thought that we may not ever have children.  Allow me to share an event that at the time of its occurrence did not seem comfortable to me.  We had a small family funeral. The baby was prepared and displayed in a small casket.  Deb’s father again helped us with this.  Deb asked her dad if she could hold the baby.  He expressed that this is a common occurrence and request from mothers who have experienced such a loss.  Deb spent some time doing this.  I mention this now for only one reason.  In the event that any of the readers experience a similar loss either as a parent, grandparent or friend, please know that this is a common emotion and can assist in the grieving process for a mother.  It meant a lot to Deb to be able to do this.  Many years have gone by and it still hurts to relay the events but this is how it all took place.

Thereafter, we went through some pretty extensive genetic testing and the results indicated that 1out of 2 children we would have would have this condition.  Given these odds and the history of our case it was decided to attempt one more time.  We did find out about some test that could be performed in the earlier stages of pregnancy.  We also found that U of M had a doctor who was experienced in this area.   At around the 4 month point of the next pregnancy, and after many test, he consulted with us and I recall what he said.  He told us that he could not insure that our next baby would be healthy but he could tell us that it did not have Potters Syndrome as did the 2 previous.  It was with quiet and anxious anticipation that Deb went through the last 5 months of the pregnancy and the day finally arrived for the trip to Sparrow Hospital for the big event.

We were anxious enough that even the slightest hint of a contraction sent us down the road to the hospital. (maybe more accurate to say I rather than we)  The first time was a false alarm but the next night we had the real deal.  I took my place in the chair as Deb by this time was used to me not being very effective in the baby bearing business.  I remember her saying to me “you sit there and you watch while I have this baby”.  She has always been a very strong person as she endures medical events of any kind. This remains true today.  It was not very long and appeared what looked to be a strong baby.  A few anxious seconds after birth came one of the most blood curdling cries I had ever heard. With it came what I think still today remains one of the most happy moments of our lives.  Seconds later Ross Nathan was placed in Deb’s arms.  Tears flowed down Deb’s cheeks and mine to the point that I suggested to her that we did not want to drown this baby before we got to take him home.  I was struck by the joy of the event in contrast to the sadness from before.  A few days later we were on our way home to the country house in Mason.  We stopped on the way to see my dad in his church office and a few other people who had grieved with us over the past events.  All in all a good day for a couple of parents who appreciated it at the very highest level that appreciation and thankfulness can go.  That Sunday when the birth was announced, the River Terrace Congregation (who had supported us very nicely) broke in to a round of applause.  I will never forget it. 

I sat in the room with Ross and watched him in the crib that first night.  I wanted to make sure the whole thing was real.  Every hour or so I would wake and make sure he was OK. I do remember that first night he pretty much slept through the night.  He seemed slightly annoyed when I would nudge him a little to make sure he was OK.  I think he was a little tired from being shown around all day.  For the most part he was a good baby.  It was not long before Deb could get out with some of her friends and it was during those times that a transformation from being a good baby to one that was a little bit more of a pain would take place.  About the only thing that would appease him was going for a ride in the car.  I put him in the car seat and drove quite a few miles that first night when I had the full responsibility.  Over the tenure of his infancy we had quite a few car rides.  He did like his food source reasonably close by.

Fast forward a little to a couple of other Ross highlights.  When he was two years old I found a little bike.  I still have it hanging in our garage today.  It had training wheels.  It was not very long and those training wheels had vibrated a little higher and it was not very long after that they never touched the ground when he rode the thing.  So it was pretty early that he had his “wheels” and he had to be watched pretty closely.  It was not many years after that, about the 5^th grade, that we borrowed a cornet from Deb’s brother Ken.  We noticed that along with all of the other stuff that little kids do that this cornet was out of the case and being played in our living room quite a bit.  We never had to ask him to practice. Some years later he would sit and play for hours in a wingback chair we had.  We gave him that chair the other day to have at his home.  It was just this past weekend that Deb and I sat in DeVos Hall and watched him perform with the GR Symphony.  Some things just have a way of working out and this has been one of those things. 

Allow me next time to share another highlight……It will involve another car seat and a move at last to the city…..Till then…..

Stan the Man