Reflections of a year gone and inspections of a life lived

It seems to me that it is about right to post a few reflections on the events of this past year. After all it has been just about a year since we received the diagnosis of Deb's cancer. I think it was August 1 of last year that she started to feel some discomfort in her midsection and it was not many days after that life changed so suddenly for both of us.   I can clearly recall in one of the meetings with the doctors one of them saying that Deb had just joined a club to which no one wants to be a member.  And I could not agree with that more.  One of the requirements of the new club is that you live in a world that is very unpredictable. It is filled with appointments, bills, pain, and somehow lacks the element of thinking much about the future.  It is remarkable to me how events and attitudes change so quickly.  I think at first it was hard to think very much about any type of future that lasted more than a 3-4 months.  As time has gone on though we encounter more people who survive this type of cancer. It seems as though a common denominator of this type of cancer is that you never reach the point of saying "the cancer is behind and solved" instead you seek different forms of treatment and go about the task of prolonging life  in whatever form you can, enjoying life.

Deb has done a good job with this.  We have taken some trips to business and pleasure destinations.  We have been able to enjoy the wedding of Mieke and Aaron.  We have enjoyed reconnecting with friends of the past that we had lost touch with to some degree.  We have felt the love of many who have given many types of gifts, cards, visits, calls and writings that have had an impact that sometimes for us goes beyond description.  Not to say at all that we do not yearn for something else in life.  I think if we never hear the word cancer again it will be OK with both of us.  When you read in the paper that someone has passed after a battle with cancer it takes on new meaning.  And folks this has been a real strong battle and it has been fought with the weapons of courage and hope that Deb has always had in her arsenal.  Along with the cancer she had to fight through a life threatening infection that resulted in a 35 day visit to the hospital and rehab facility.  For those that were close to this it had at times an amazing aspect to it.  And really things have been kind of tougher since that time. Increasing pain and medications that affect the system have been hard to deal with.  The long and the short of it is that this has been about all you want in a medical experience. There are times when I become concerned that the reflections in these blogs do not tell the whole story.  The fact is that this is difficult situation.  Not feeling good most of the time has a impact that only those who have endured it can relate.

So much for reflections and on to inspections. Recently we had the privilege of having the parents of Rumy visit our home.  I learned much from their visit.  It was their first time on a airplane and their first exposure to our country.  Rumy's father was better at English than I thought.  He inspected carefully the life we live and it was interesting to me that he took hundreds if not thousands of pictures.  It was amazing to me the things that caught his attention.  He seemed to marvel at things that I had long taken for granted. The quality of our roads and cars, the abundance of our food, the size of our homes and buildings, the lack of trash on our roads, the nice way his family was greeted and respected by our people, the safety and lack of stealing and crime in our area, and so on and so on,  He was a very resourceful person and and one point he said to me that life in his land just seemed harder than anything we experience.  It was in his comments that I felt a pride in our country that I had not thought of much before. He said to me once that something seemed to be good about the way things are here.  I think we all sometimes take our experience in life to be normal but he taught me that we live in a land that has some things that are really right.  After they left I thought about this some more. Since that time my thanks for our system and our government have grown.  He was a very smart person and in my exposure to him he taught me to appreciate more some of the things we have here.  He was also the king barbecue man on the planet earth. I thought I held this title but I am now in second place.  A fine gentleman and a fine family that taught me a lot about life.

Stan the Man.